A recent trip to Boise, Idaho got me thinking about God’s rescue plan for our marriage. Randy and I had traveled there for a friend’s wedding. I always enjoy road trips–and this was no exception! On our way home, we drove through the cute mountain town, McCall. We immediately recognized an amazing photo op overlooking a lake. As we positioned ourselves for a selfie, a woman jumped up from a bench and asked if she could take our picture. She said, “It’s obvious you two are still in love.” I grinned, realizing she had noticed Randy & me holding hands. This is just normal for us now. I think it has a lot to do with both of us going through heart surgeries in the past two years. We don’t take anything for granted. So we got this great picture, thanks to the woman from Texas who told us “you rock!”
Navigating the Shadows
Not always the case, though. I have not-so-fond memories of living in Boise for a brief time after Randy got out of the Air Force. We naively thought it would be easy to find a job in the tough 1980s economy. Transitioning from flying in a fighter/recon aircraft to let’s say working for an insurance agency was like trying to leap over the
Randy and I “still in love” in McCall, ID
Grand Canyon. In six weeks, Randy had only one job interview–and he didn’t get the job. In a panic, we landed in Boise where Randy accepted a very part-time job with the Air National Guard. The stress and insecurity only intensified the issues we had struggled with in our 10 years of marriage. The year we spent in Boise was fraught with emotional pain and feeling un-tethered, free-falling into some unknown pit of despair.
40 Years Later
To come back to Boise 40 years later, “still in love,” is a miracle only God could do! A lot happens in 40 years… I told about my Boise experience (then and now!) in a support group recently. A woman there, much younger than me, felt overwhelmed by thinking of a difficult journey that could span many decades. Forty years, really?? Now that I’m on this side of it, I can understand why it would seem daunting. It’s God’s mercy that we don’t know what the future holds. But as the well-known saying goes–“we do know Who holds the future!”
It’s in adversity that we grow and change. I don’t like it–and I would gladly take another path. But here I am today–stronger, and many times wiser than my 30-year-old self who felt so lost and alone. Boise, though an extremely dark and painful time, marked the beginning of a journey toward healing and hope for both Randy and me. I wish it could’ve taken a lot less time, but now I can say I’m grateful for the journey and all I have learned.
God’s Rescue Plan
I heard something profound as I listened to Bob Goff’s podcast, Dream Big. He talked about how we sometimes feel like we need a battle plan to negotiate life’s struggles. “What we really need,” he said, “is a rescue plan.” As I look back over those 40 years, I see how God’s rescue plan unfolded for us:
- The friend who handed me a Bible tract when I didn’t realize how much I needed the Savior.
- Another friend who made time in her busy schedule each week to study the Bible with me.
- Renting a house in Boise next door to a compassionate and caring couple who offered unconditional support.
- The provision of a new job for Randy that provided the opportunity for a fresh start.
The list could go on! I learned without a doubt that God is faithful. He promises never to leave us or forsake us–and I have experienced this firsthand. He rescued us from despair and transformed our lives in ways we never could have imagined.
You did it: you changed wild lament into whirling dance;
You ripped off my black mourning band and decked me with wildflowers.
I’m about to burst into song;
I can’t keep quiet about you.
God, my God, I can’t thank you enough. (Psalm 30: 11-12, MSG)
If you’re struggling in your marriage and need someone to listen and pray with you, I would love to do that. Let’s Chat! https://calendly.com/debkalmbach/30min
